This is not the old romantic tale of Laila-Majnu, Heer-Ranjha, Sassi-Punnu, Sohni-Mahiwal, or Mirza-Sahibaan; this is a story of modern times. Love and affection, loyalty and betrayal exist in this story as well. The relationship between the lover and the beloved is complex, delicate, and sensitive. In this tale, the lover is local (desig) and the beloved is foreign (overseas); the lover is hopeful (rajai – submissive/optimistic), while the beloved is fickle (harjai); the lover prays for the long life of the beloved, while the beloved wishes for the swift demise of the lover. It is a strange relationship and an interesting love where emotions exist on both sides, but while one side is tender, the other is fierce. If the lover is wayward, the beloved is completely blazing and furious.
Why prolong the tale? There is no harm in revealing the secret. My beloved is overseas—the sole support, asset, and investment of my hopes. They are a piece of my heart; their parents raised and nurtured them with love and affection. Life in the country (Pakistan) was difficult; there was plenty of love, but the economy was weak. Sending the apple of one’s eye across the seven seas was a difficult decision, but the parents put a heavy stone on their hearts and sent them overseas for a better future. When they were in Pakistan, they were a beloved; once they went abroad, they became even more beloved and turned into a master/tormenter (ma’shoog). At first, the relationship between the lover and the beloved was very strong—there were daily phone calls and contact. Then the beloved’s pockets grew heavier, busyness increased, and contacts decreased. Out of sight, out of mind—relationships weaken as well. As my beloved became wealthy, they became even more handsome. Earlier, they considered their lover wise and sought their advice on everything, expressing their hardships. Then they became wise on their own—so wise that not only did they start giving personal advice, but they also began lecturing the entire nation. Earlier, they smelled of this native soil; having gone there and begun to shine, they became habituated to foreign customs. Earlier, they learned to walk by treading in these very mud puddles, but now, walking on milk-white roads, mud seemed ugly to them. Earlier, they found peace in the lover’s lap, but now they found beauty in the winds of a foreign land. Perhaps the poet referred to this very situation:
When it reached your tresses, it was called beauty
That darkness which is in my black-lettered scroll
The years of separation between the lover and the beloved increased, and much water flowed under the bridges during this time. The lover’s economic, political, and personal condition also did not remain good. Initially, the beloved provided financial help, kept exalting them, and maintained respect and regard. But the salty water of the seven seas is filled with some disloyalty and some indifference. Now the beloved has started pulling back their hand. The beloved’s wife and children became their new lovers, and they began forgetting their old and loyal lover. What with the distances between the lover and the beloved, contradictions even arose in their thoughts, complaints and grievances multiplied, and the beloved began to see a hundred faults in their lover. Yet, what could the lover do? They had only one beloved; whatever that foreigner became, they belonged entirely to the foreign land.
Now, what should the lover do? Like every beloved, the lover’s beloved is not only delicate but also temperamental. The beloved is always fickle and the lover is always hopeful; what other choice does the lover have except to remain hopeful? The lover considers the beloved their asset, the axis and center of their hopes, while the beloved is hopeless and disillusioned with the lover. The lover has not lost heart yet; they never tire of praising the beauty and demeanor of the beloved day in and day out. In response, however, the beloved delivers such stinging remarks that one can only exclaim: Al-amaan wal-hafeez (God save us)! The lover constantly tries under various pretexts to keep the beloved happy, while the beloved picks flaws in the lover’s body and soul. If the lover gets news of the overseas beloved’s arrival, not only the lover but their friends roll out the red carpet (spread their eyelashes). When they arrive, it feels like Eid for the lover; everyone they meet hosts feasts for the beloved, trying to woo and charm them. When the grief-stricken lover sees the beloved face-to-face, they try to bring up past tales to awaken the sleeping emotions of the beloved, but all of this goes in vain. The beloved’s nose has gone so high that they like nothing of this country and find everything good in the foreign land. That fruit was from a native garden, but foreign grafting made its fruit foreign as well.
The distance, gaps, and anger between the lover and the beloved did not grow just like that; among these grievances, some are true and some are fake narratives. The general complaint of the beloved is that the market of oppression is blazing in the lover’s country—there is neither justice nor equality. This complaint has not only grown with the changes in prisoners and politics, but has intensified. Yet, when the beloved is told that such political oppression has accompanied every political shift, the innocent beloved replies that such oppression never existed in history. Even the super-old stories of lashes, gallows, or prisons fail to satisfy the beloved. The beloved complains that their land and property in the lover’s country have been usurped. When asked who seized it, the answer comes: friends and relatives. Then, if asked whether there is documentary proof of the remitted money, or whether the property under dispute is in your name or a joint account, the general answer is that a relative seized it, but documentary proof is absent. Then there is the beloved’s favorite story: so-and-so person, compelled by love for the homeland, brought investment into the country but lost it all and returned. When details are asked, business mismanagement or poor planning turns out to be the bigger cause. But the beloved cannot be left speechless, so they say that everyone in the country is a fraudster, all politicians are thieves, all journalists are bribed (lifafa), all police are criminals—nothing is right in this country. No matter how much the beloved is convinced through logic and arguments, they refuse to budge. The beloved’s favorite pastime is to badmouth their lover and their own country; perhaps this is the catharsis for the grief of the exile’s migration.
The lover is grief-stricken, distressed, and astonished as well: how to tame the beloved, how to make them happy? They look at Chinese overseas, seeing those Chinese beloveds who sacrifice themselves for their lover China. They look at North Korea—how an isolated nuclear nation defying America remains alive, well, and prosperous—and it becomes evident that overseas Koreans residing in Japan send golden remittances not only providing economic stability to their country, but also securing its defense. The lover believes that imprisonment within the motherland is far better than freedom in a foreign land. The motherland can never exile even the greatest criminal. When a mother falls ill or her shirt gets torn, one cures the illness and makes complete arrangements for covering her modesty. As for the rest—even if the beloved becomes a hundred times unfaithful or indifferent—they are destined to remain the beloved nonetheless…!